


While She Was Away

by itsalliepg



Category: The Freshman Series (Visual Novels)
Genre: Angst, F/M, First Person, zig's pov
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-03
Updated: 2020-03-03
Packaged: 2021-02-23 03:16:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,656
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23004871
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/itsalliepg/pseuds/itsalliepg
Summary: Zig’s point of view after breaking up with Scarlett (MC) and her trip to London in The Senior.
Relationships: Zig Ortega/Main Character (The Freshman)
Kudos: 5





	While She Was Away

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys! Here’s Zig’s POV about The Senior events (I mean, their break up and how he decided to go to London to see her). It’s the first time I write in first person and I enjoying a lot getting into Zig’s mind LOL I must warn you there’s angst but if you know me, you can wait for a happy ending ;) English isn’t my native language. I write to practice and learn, so please sorry any mistakes. I hope you like it!

Then Scarlett closed the door and I threw myself on the couch. The last thing we shared was a dirty look. Not even goodbye. She was mad at me, and I was mad at her. Why did our relationship become that? Couldn’t she understand my side? Couldn’t she be happy for me, as she always did? She was always so supportive of me, when I decided to go to Hartfeld, when I joined the football team, the dance team, when my grades were tampered with…and this was the most important step I would take, I would leave my family, my friends for the biggest adventure of my life, and I wanted her to come with me! I was thinking about her too when I signed up for the teaching program, wouldn’t it be a life-changing experience for her too? I thought about how much inspiration she would have if she traveled to a totally different country, with a totally different culture, and she’s so intelligent, she could get a job there in no time…I got up and walked around the living room. I kept repeating her words in my mind, trying to find out what happened, why we ended up like this.

Did you even stop to think that I might have my own plans? Or were you too busy thinking about yourself?

How would you feel if I’d just taken it? Without talking to you? Without giving you a say?

So you’re saying I shouldn’t even try?

Is that all you think I do? I just laze around typing on my laptop all day? What about my career?

Funny, I seem to be the only person sacrificing anything in this arrangement.

Is that what our relationship’s come to? Either you give up your dream or I do? Zig, I can’t do this. If that’s how you really feel we’re done!

“If I really loved you”? Really? I’ve been nothing but supportive since we started dating. Because I’m the supportive one! The helpful one! The one everyone calls in a crisis! Need a study buddy? Want to throw a party? How about a cheerleader for your dance audition? Just call Scarlett! She’ll drop everything!

Well after three freaking years it’s my turn to be selfish, damn it! And if you can’t find room in “our plan” for my dreams, then I’ll make my own plan. Without you!

I mean we’re over.

That was rough. I was wondering if I should go after her and say that we could talk and work things out, maybe we could try long-distance like we did during the summer when she was in San Francisco, but I think I was too shaken after those words.

We’re over.

The tears I was holding came easily. I was mad at everything. At the world. At Scarlett. But especially at me. I couldn’t help but feel it was all my fault. I was in a trance when I suddenly felt Oliver hopping on my legs. Nala was following behind. I could see how sad they were. They knew something bad had happened.

_I’m sorry you had to hear all this, babies – I took Nala in my arms and scratched Oliver’s head – but mommy’s gone, and… - that was too much. My next words were punctuated by sobs – I don’t know when she’ll be back…for a while, it’ll just be daddy with you – I walked towards the room and saw Aylmer in his tank. He was also sad – oh, Aylmer, I’m sorry – I put some food for him in the water while I stared at her side of the closet, empty. It broke my heart even more. That apartment was so hollow when she was in California, but I talked to her every day, so it helped me to deal with her absence. Now she no longer lived here. But the sight of a whole wardrobe with only my clothes on wasn’t as hurtful as what I saw on her desk. The star necklace I gave her two years ago on her birthday, the first one we spent together. She never left home without it, and now…she did it. That was a sign that she wanted nothing more about me in her life.

I still thought Scarlett was being selfish. But she was right. She’s a caretaker, as I said a few days ago, she always put other people’s necessities over hers, and I always had to remember her she was important too. And she finally took my advice. She understood that her career was important. I was thinking about her when I decided that but…I didn’t consider what she wanted. It was really all my fault.

I lay on the bed and stared at the necklace in my hands while cursing myself a million times. All the fears I had when I met Scarlett came back to haunt me. When I saw her in the coffee shop for the first time, I remember exactly how I was dazzled by her beauty. All I wanted was a chance to talk to her, and then she helped me after I punched Sebastian, and fate continued to put our paths together. But even so, I was afraid. Afraid that she would get tired of me. Or that she would see that we were from different worlds. She was smart, had a lot of friends who loved her, a solid family structure, she had everything to conquer the world. And I had a damn criminal record that only gave me low-paying jobs and judgments wherever I went. I couldn’t give her a good life, the life she deserved. She wouldn’t be eager to introduce me to her family as her boyfriend. I wasn’t good enough for her. But she believed in me. In a way that I never believed myself. Of course, my mom and sisters believed in me, but having this support from someone who wasn’t my family, and I was so interested, meant the world to me. I almost couldn’t believe she said yes when I asked her to be my girlfriend. And we lived so many things together, and then rented this apartment together…I’ve never felt so happy in my life. I could have a college degree as I always dreamed of and had an amazing woman by my side to face the world with me. And during our trip we made so many plans, where would we live, children…I love her more than I ever loved someone. And now I screwed everything. That feeling that I would do some bullshit and throw it all away. And I did. Congrats, Zig.

My phone started buzzing and I saw my mom was calling me. I texted her earlier saying that I had good news. It didn’t look so good now. I let my phone ring. I was in no mood to talk. I just wanted to cry all the pain I was feeling in my heart.

_

Almost a month has passed since Scarlett and I broke up. I had no guts to unfriend her on FaceSpace, but I also didn’t want to see her. I mean, I wanted, but I didn’t know how I would react if I saw her triumphs she didn’t want to share with me. Sometimes I wondered if she thought about me, if she missed me as much as I did. She only texted me to ask about our pets, and as much as I tried, I couldn’t answer more than “They’re fine”. I asked the gang if they had news about her, but she barely spoke to them either. Zack only knew she was living with her parents and driving all the way to Hartfeld every day, and would get that study abroad program in London. Maybe she would do that interview in person. She really wanted to focus on her now. And I had no space in it. I wanted to be angry, but then I remembered I did the same. And I should also focus on the trip to Japan about to happen, I would stay a week in Tokyo to know the school that was assigned to me and visit the city. I should be excited, that was all I wanted, right? But I wasn’t. I wish she was with me. I only knew she was going to London because Abbie told me Scarlett was saying goodbye to her. I thought…it would be nice if I texted her wishing a good trip…I took my phone and started writing…but then I deleted it. I must have done this a thousand times. So I finally sent something.

Good luck in London. Be safe.

I started cursing myself again. Just that, Zig? How about “I miss you” or “I love you” or “I’m sorry”? I didn’t know why I couldn’t write more than that. I stared at my phone and Oliver jumped on my lap and licked my face, trying to cheer me up. But I knew he was sad.

_I know, buddy. I miss her too.

_

I was sitting in a park under a cherry tree in Tokyo and texting my mom. She was very happy for me, never imagined a kid of hers could go this far. And at the same time, she tried to cheer me up. That’s what I wanted, and I was doing my best to make the most of Tokyo, but each new place I visited, each new food I tried, each new Japanese word I learned, I couldn’t help thinking about Scarlett and how much she would love that. The smiles in the pictures I posted online where almost fake. This trip would be the beginning of everything, and I wasn’t as happy as I should have been. That trip was the reason for the worst mistake I made in my life. Was she thinking of me in London as much I thought of her in Tokyo?

_

I was in the library working on my thesis and thank God, I was inspired and everything was going well. Then I felt a hand in my shoulder.

_Hey, Zig. Sorry, are you busy?

_Hey, Abbie. I was just working on my thesis, but I should take a break now – she sat next to me – what’s up?

_So, I’m going to London tomorrow to spend a weekend with Scarlett – I felt a chill down my spine.

_Oh, that’s nice…

_Do you…do you want me to say something to her? – she stared at me until I finally said something.

_I just want you to let me know how’s she’s doing. If she’s okay, you know – Abbie nodded, she knew I wanted to say more. But I simply couldn’t, I don’t know why I became so coward. I could ask Abbie to tell Scarlett that I missed her, and still loved her after all, but the words never left my mouth.

_Okay, I’ll tell her – she gave me a reassuring squeeze in my shoulder before leaving the library. It was difficult but within minutes I was back in my thesis.

_

Abbie came back, and she suggested the gang a night in a bar to be able to tell us about her trip to London. Scarlett was fine, and that relieved me. She was having fun in London and the job offer was incredible, Scarlett would have a great salary, enough to live well there. I was happy for her, really. But it hurt to know she was going her own way without me. I quietly left the table and sat down on a bench outside the bar. All the tears I’ve been holding for almost two months have left my eyes.

_Zig, are you okay? – Chris sat next to me and I wiped away my tears.

_She’s fine without me, isn’t she? – I asked still sobbing – she loves being in London and received a job offer that she couldn’t refuse. Why would she turn it down? – Chris wrapped an arm around my shoulders – she’ll stay in London and I’ll go to Tokyo. I’ll never see her again and it’s all my fault!

_Zig, she didn’t say she would take that job, and if you sit and talk when she comes back, I’m sure you can work things out – I shook my head.

_I don’t think she wants to see me. After everything I’ve done, I deserve that. God, I miss her so much!

_She also misses you, Zig – Abbie also left the bar and crouched in front of me – she asked me about you, but I knew she wanted to talk to you, but she couldn’t. Just like you – she smiled at me, and I outlined a smile.

_You think she misses me?

_I didn’t go to London, but I’m sure she does – Chris messed with my hair like he used to do when I did well in our football practices – a strong relationship like yours can’t end like this.

_You were always so supportive of each other, and mellowed, unlike me and Tyler…I know you can work things out if you talk – I felt more excited.

_Maybe I could…no, this is crazy…

_What? – Chris asked.

_Go to London to see her, and apologize, and say everything I’m holding on to my chest. It can’t be over the phone. I need to look her in the eye.

_It’s a great idea, Zig! You should surprise her, I will send you her address.

_But I have no money to afford a ticket to London. I spent almost everything I had in Japan… - I could see Abbie and Chris exchanging a look.

_What if…we chip in and buy you a ticket? – I looked at Chris, startled.

_What? I…no, I couldn’t accept.

_Zig, we love Scarlett and you, you’re our dear friends and we want the best for you. If this makes you and her feel better, I’m sure the others would love to help – that was awesome. I started to cry again, but now with joy.

_I…wow, I don’t even know what to say. You’re the best friends a guy could ask for – I stood up and wrapped the two of them in tight hugs.

_So, how about you go Friday night?

_I could go now, Abbie! But Friday night looks great.

_

All the way to London, I kept thinking about everything I wanted to say to Scarlett. I repeated the words in my head over and over again. At the same time I had a pitch of hope in my heart that we could be together again, I was afraid she wouldn’t want to. After everything I did, she had a right not to want to forgive me. I took a taxi to the address Abbie texted me and knocked on the door louder than I wanted. I finally heard the sound of a key opening it.

_Hey…what are you doing here? – there she was. As beautiful as I remembered. It was almost four years since I first saw her, but she was still able to take my breath away. Scarlett. The woman I loved more than anything. The woman who changed my life forever.

_I’m here for you, Scarlett. I can’t do this anymore – I was so nervous I was trembled – Can I…come in? – she hesitated for a few seconds. Oh, great. She will slam the door in my face, I deserve it. But no, she moved aside so I could get into her flat. I sighed and looked into her beautiful brown eyes – I love you, Scarlett, and I made a huge mistake. The way we left things, I half expected you to slam the door in my face. And I would have deserved it. But…Scarlett, I can’t stand being without you – I ran my hand through my hair and sighed again – I keep thinking about our last fight. I was such an idiot. I was so excited about Japan, I didn’t think about what it would mean for you. You were right to call me on it. I took you for granted, and just assumed your support was a given. I’m so, so sorry Scarlett. I love you, Scarlett. I love you and miss you. Please take me back – the words came easily, better than I expected. She looked at me sweetly.

_Oh, Zig…I missed you too. I’d be lying if I said I never thought about you – she smiled shyly – it doesn’t help that my flat looks out onto a dance studio. Every Thursday they teach ballroom dance, and I think of our vacation – I smiled too.

_We certainly taught the folks at Golden Oaks a thing or two, didn’t we? – I approached her slowly, and took her hand. That was the first time I touched her after those two months apart. I wanted her to know how much I cared about her with just that gesture – I know I screwed up. We should have talked about our plans for graduation months before now. In hindsight, I realize you tried to bring it up, but I assumed things would just “work out” because we loved each other.

_What are you saying?

_Why don’t we have that talk now? And this time, I’ll listen. Please give me another chance – I looked at her and she just looked me in the eye. For the first time, I couldn’t realize what she was thinking. I didn’t know if she would fight me again, or let go of my hand, until she finally spoke.

_Yes, yes, yes! – she squeezed my hand and smiled, that smile I loved so much, lightening up her face.

_Y-you mean it? – I asked, stammering, eyes wide. That was too good to be true. Still smiling, she nodded, and before I knew, she launched herself in my arms and kissed me. That was our first kiss in two months and, wow, how I missed feeling her lips on mine. I held her as tightly as I could, but nothing seemed enough.

_It’s been too long since I’ve been kissed senseless, Zig – she smirked. Was she daring me like we used to do? I laughed, I was so happy to got her back. I just bit her lower lip and whispered.

_Guess I’ve got some catching up to do – I took her in my arms again and guided her against the wall while I kissed her as if it were the last thing I would do in my life. I was remembering everything, her taste, her scent, her warmth, the feeling of tangling my fingers in her hair, not that I had forgotten, but the reality was better than any fantasy. I lost track of time and stopped when we were both gasping for air.

_Zig, one. Senses, zero – she joked, but I could tell she was a little dizzy. I laughed at her joke, at the effect I had on her and all the happiness I was feeling. But we needed to talk.

_I’m serious, though. What do we want our future to look like? Honestly, as long as we’re together, I’m good with anything.

_I want…to go to Japan with you – what? Did she really say that?

_Are you sure? I don’t want you to give up your dream for me.

_I’m sure. Like you said, we should have talked about your placement beforehand. If we had, I would have told you to go for it. I knew it was coming after all. I was just hurt that you decided for both of us, and I needed to choose something for myself – I looked down, embarrassed. She noticed, then smiled and took my hands – so I chose Quills and gave it a shot. But now…I’m choosing you. I want to travel with you to Japan. I want to learn a new language. I want to explore the unknown with you – that was too good to be true. But after all, I didn’t want her to feel she had to go to Japan with me just because I wanted to.

_Scarlett, that’s amazing, but your writing’s important. Will you feel fulfilled in Japan? Quills sounded like a dream job.

_It’s definitely someone’s dream job. Just not mine. I’ve read Quills Magazine. They’re really influential in the European journalism scene, but I don’t think that’s my scene. I won’t stop writing in Japan. I’ll keep hustling. I’ll send in applications. But as long as I’m with you, I’ll be happy – she took my face in her hands and caressed my cheek before kissing me again. I rested my forehead on hers. That was everything I wanted. Japan wouldn’t be the same without her – I never dreamed you would follow me all the way to London – I pulled back and smiled at her.

_You should thank our friends – I told her about Chris’ idea. She grinned that way I loved – and they were so sure we would make up that they buy me a ticket back to US just for tomorrow night! I don’t know where I would sleep if you didn’t want to come back to me.

_Well, I wouldn’t let you sleep on the street, or at the airport – she smiled and hugged me – and does that mean you will be here for the weekend? That’s great! I’m not ready to let you go yet! – we giggled – and we should have some fun! I’ll show you my favorite spots in London, pubs, restaurants, parks, shops…

_By the way, is this dress new? – I pointed to the beautiful velvet dress she was wearing. I must not know much about women’s fashion, but I did know when an outfit looked good on her – I don’t think I ever saw you wear it. Did you buy here?

_Well, it was bought here, but by my mother. Did you know she also lived here when she was my age? – she told me about her mother living here, and we had an incredible afternoon together (she was happy when I returned the necklace), she took me to the Tower of London, then we had dinner and some drinks in a pub before I took her to my surprise in Big Ben (thanks, Aaron!) where we could satisfy our desires and show how much we missed each other. I have to say, I would never have imagined one day I would have sex inside Big Ben! But I’m glad it was with Scarlett. And I was madly missing having her body against mine. Sunday night came and I traveled back to Hartfeld, but I didn’t get on the plane before Scarlett covered me with kisses, and I, of course, did the same. The travel back was much better that the outward one. I couldn’t wait for her to come home.

_

The following Saturday, I was driving to Scarlett’s parents’ house. She was staying in England for two more weeks and asked me to bring back to Hartfeld some of her clothes that were in the Thomas. But I also something else to talk to them about. Very important. I told my mom about it and she gave me all the support I needed. Therese and Louis opened the door when I arrived. Both of them smiling widely at me.

_Zig! It’s so good to see you again!

_It’s good to see you too, Louis – I hugged them both.

_Scarlett’s clothes are already in her bag, but I hope you stay a little longer – I noticed that, although they were separated, they seemed to get along very well. I couldn’t say they were facing a crisis if I didn’t know. This was good. Maybe they were reconciling and Scarlett would be happy – do you want to have lunch with us?

_I don’t want to be an inconvenience to you.

_Nonsense, Zig. You’re very welcome here. And we’re so happy you and Scarlett are back together! – Louis said. I smiled bashfully.

_Yeah, I’m very happy too. And I must apologize to you, for everything I said and did to your daughter. It was the worst mistake of my life – Therese smiled sweetly at me.

_You don’t have to apologize. You two are young, are still learning to deal with relationship issues. If even older people have problems… - she glanced at Louis. But I felt more relieved. After what I did, I was afraid they would…well, it doesn’t matter anymore.

_Well, I’m glad you are not mad at me. Because I want to talk to you about something very important.

_Oh, what it would be? – Louis said and sat on the couch. Therese and I did the same. I was sat in an armchair in front of them. I was just as nervous as the first time I met them. I sighed and could feel my heart calming. Okay, Zig. You can do it.

_First of all, I want to say that all this time apart only made me see how much I love Scarlett and how lucky I am for having her in my life. When I first met her, I was unhappy with my life and all my dreams of having a college degree and working with something I like were kind of dead inside of me. But then I met her and she made me see how much I was worth and that I could do anything I want. My life changed because of her, not only because she inspired me to it, but also because I could see a future with her. I love her with all my heart and soul and I want to spend the rest of my life with her. I want to introduce her to people as my wife – I looked at Louis – you said that day that you gave me permission to propose to Scarlett. But after everything that had happened, I don’t know if I still have it. So I want to ask: do I still have permission to marry Scarlett? – they had an unreadable expression in their faces, which made me even more nervous.

_Zig, of course you have permission! You make Scarlett so happy that it also makes us happy.

_Louis is right, Zig. I don’t think I’ve ever seen my daughter so happy since you started dating. You supported her through all the difficulties she had over these three years you’re together and it’s good to know there’s someone is looking after her – they grinned at me and I smiled back. Kindness was definitely a family thing.

_Thank you so much. It means a lot to me.

_And…Scarlett told us you’re going to Japan after graduation? – Therese asked and I told them all about the teaching abroad program while we eat. I had a wonderful time with my girlfriend’s parents and never felt so welcome somewhere before. What happened was water under the bridge and I got a new chance to make things right. I drove the way back to Hartfeld, thinking about how I would propose to Scarlett. The night before the graduation could be a good one. Louis mentioned he was thinking of making a reservation at a nice restaurant to celebrate our graduation and all our friends would be invited. I was already saving money to buy a ring, and it had to be a gorgeous ring, just like Scarlett. I couldn’t wait to propose to her. I was more than ready to take the next step with her.

While she was away, I thought that I had lost her forever. The days without her were the worst of my life. Since I met her, since I laid eyes on her for the first time, she never left my thoughts. But now I’ve got her back. And I would cherish that to the fullest. Because I knew what it feels when she’s not around. I would dedicate my life to making her happy. Even more than I ever did before.


End file.
